star flowers

I know why I’m here.

As I was working on updating my blog, I came across a post that I wrote, almost 2 years ago, after moving from Portland to our home here. In it, I share a dream that I had: …the last 4-5 nights, my sleep has been riddled with dreams and restlessness. Those dreams are sure signs that I’m not giving myself the space to be with and process what I’ve been experiencing and feeling. It’s a natural part of big changes, I’m sure. Night before last,…

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120813_birdofparadise

I am a voice.

I had a revelation today. I discovered, at least in meta terms, why I’m here. It’s not to just have a voice, but to be one. I am here to love, speak, paint, sing, and live with my voice. This is my spiritual horizon and my creative work. There is a vitality, a life force, an energy, a quickening that is translated through you into action, and because there is only one of you in all time, this expression is unique. And if you block…

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120913_agave

Gratitude junkie

My friend Natalie, at ChickenBlog, has this awesome tradition of listing 5 good things each Monday.  I’m a gratitude junkie – so I’m in! (I’m squeaking in under the wire with only 45 minutes left of Monday… but in is in!)  I haven’t always been a gratitude junkie. I remember, when down in the dumps as a teen, my mom asking me to list 10 things that I could be grateful for. I used to get so mad at her. The last thing I wanted…

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120713_rainyday

rain and rainbows

Yesterday was full of good and interesting weather. As we were heading out of the house to make way to The Bird House for a tamale making party, the sun made a break from the clouds and shone bright through the rain. I immediately began my search for a rainbow and found it directly behind me. It was even a double rainbow…  This rainbow made you believe in the pot of gold and want to start running for its end. This rainbow was one of…

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eucalyptus trunk

this stormy day

The skies are grey. These photos are from just before the storm came in. There is a fine, thin mist falling, followed by a squall and then a sun break. Next up, mix up the order and repeat. The gusts knock over the holiday poinsettias and Christmas decorations. It’s a stormy day!  I’m happy. If you don’t live in Southern California, the novelty of this is lost. I’m revelling in it while I can.  Tomorrow’s forecast is sun. Stormy weather brings out the side of…

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ornamental grass

for the love of grasses

I’m having a small love affair with ornamental grass. There’s something I never imagined myself saying. This particular type is widely used, but its commonness hasn’t lessened my fascination for it. I love how they are a dark maroon and gold color at first glance, and on closer look a rainbow of colors. I love watching them move and dance in the wind. The fronds, depending on their mood, move in a synchronized dance or personal freestyle. I love how, depending on how you look…

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120513_ornamentalgrass

Creative impulses

Not-writing begets not-writing. The less I write, the less I have to write about. Writing begets writing. The more I write, the more I have to write about.  At least, this this true for me. My creative process requires continuity. This is true for me whether it be writing, photography, or painting. Now that I’m thinking about it, this is true for me spiritually too. Is spirituality creativity? Are they synonymous? If not precisely, then they are closely related. Today, I grabbed my camera as…

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102313_fallcolors3

Filling up sight and soul with autumn ahh!

I have a slew photos to share with you.  I have this amazing friend, Natalie. She and three of the four of her amazing children took us to a nearby park to picnic and soak up some autumn delights. I had to share some of my delight with you! I can’t tell you how good it did me to take this in. Amira was glowing too! We knew we missed the sight and feel of fall – we just didn’t know how much! I couldn’t…

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looking_through

Busting Through the Illusion

Why struggle to open a door between us when the whole wall is an illusion? – Rumi There are so many ways that I feel walled in right now. In some situations, I don’t see a closed door that I can’t open… I don’t see a door at all! Now, if you know me, you know I’m not a pessimist. I do work hard to see the possibilities and believe that what is highest and best for my life is both here *right now* and…

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More imperfect perfect

I have more imperfect perfect to share with you. Quite a bit more, actually. Pelicans are another of my favorite things about being back on the coast (and I confess, the list is long). They are, at once, awkward and graceful. Come to think of it, they are one of nature’s imperfect perfect, aren’t they? They are our modern day toy-pterodactyls that own the cliff sides and the ocean’s fringed edge. I love watching them soar in group formation and dive into the sea for…

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