120813_cactus

Because it is hard

I was given another opportunity to let go of my fear and grow recently. Being an artist confronts me in so many ways. It has stretched me. I’ve sold paintings off and on. And, without fail, I have the worst time getting myself to box them up and ship them. It’s been, unfortunately, a rarity that I’ve gotten them out in a timely manner.

I have been ready and willing to chalk it up to being lazy. And granted, it really is a pain making custom boxes. But, this week, when Paul asked me if I had boxed up my latest two sales yet and I averted my eyes and said no. I mumbled something about getting off my lazy arse and getting it done. He replied: “It’s not lazy. You’re afraid. You are afraid they aren’t going to love it when the receive the painting.”

And there it is.

While getting started and painting used to be my biggest hurdle… boxing up sold paintings has now taken first place. But now that I know, it’s going to change my relationship to the process and I’ll know it for the growing/spiritual work that it is.

In just the last day, a mantra has emerged for me: “Do it, because it is hard.” It doesn’t sound inspiring exactly, does it? And yet, I have found that it is. It started in my mind the other day. Amira was at her Girls on the Run program and I arrived a bit early to pick her up. When I saw her, she was sauntering down the track when most of the other girls were still jogging. I asked her why and she made some comment about there was only a minute or so left. I encouraged her to challenge herself finish out strong and she said: “… but it’s hard.” My mind replied: “Do it, because it is hard.” But, I think it was was more for me than her in this situation. And the mantra is taking root in me.

What mantras have taken root and are growing you, right now?

4 thoughts on “Because it is hard”

  1. Oh Janece, so perfectly captured. The few things I’ve done, I give away. Every once in awhile someone will see it first and say why not charge for it? Usually, I would say ‘oh, i don’t need the money – or nah, it’s just for fun. The truth is closer to what you’ve written. Attaching a monetary value to it, for me, changes the dynamic entirely. For me, it’s really “i’m not worth it” in the context of creating art. Geez, not sure this makes sense. hugs, m

  2. “Do it because it is hard” is one of those mantras that can lead to amazing life experiences! Thanks for inspiring me to bite the bullet and keep doing the difficult things that inevitably lead to growth and sometimes even satisfaction! You’re awesome! :)

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